I stood there for 8-10mins...I couldn't take my eyes off the person standing in the balcony of the apartment next to our next door neighbours' house. He seemed to be of my age only, but not of the same clan or I would say same religion. Muslim? Punjabi? Naah! His features were a cross between Jacob Black of The Twilight saga and an albino. I am seeing him for the first time and he totally got me out of my mind for a few minutes. I realized soon enough that it was very improper for a girl to be hiding behind the curtains of her room's window and gaping at your neighbor. I closed my shutters immediately...he seemed not to have noticed me and i didn't want to be noticed either. Anyway it was almost noon time and also the time for my bath, but I must admit...it was hard not to think about him! His face seemed so immaculate, composed as he stood there looking at the road below. I have got to know who this new stranger in the colony was.
After the lunch, I came back to my room and reopened the shutters. This time there was a lady in the same balcony who seemed to be in her fifties. She too had the same features which her son possessed. However she seemed to have noticed me staring at her and immediately adjusted her glasses for a better look at the person who was stalking her. I pretended not to notice...her gaze was not friendly. The window where I was standing was just beside my bed and in front of was my study table. Usually I don't sit down at my table to do my lessons...but today I had too. Sitting on a chair and studying for hours gives me tremendous back ache. I prefer to do my work rolling on the bed, much to the disapproval of my parents. But my curiosity got the best of me today. I just have to see the boy again, maybe this time I would want him to notice me too.
1 Hour...2 hours....and so on...no one appeared in the balcony. Maybe sitting here had not been a good idea, anyway my lessons were in the doldrums due to this expectation-wise distraction. And the back ache was getting worse...I thought of taking a break (well not from studying since I have read nothing all afternoon) from this sudden sitting-in-the-table-chair-studying and decided to continue with my lessons in the usual way. I studied for the next 3 hours without any intention of getting distracted on my own, I had strictly told myself not to think about any stray person while you are studying. And I didn't do that, all the time i was catering to my brain the valuable facts of chemistry.
"It's been 2 and a half months already Megha, he didn't give any reply to my sms!!!"
"Did you call him? Or emailed him or anything?"
"I have tried every possible way of reaching him yaar, I don't think Arush is interested in our relationship anymore...it's breaking my heart Megs...we have been together for 3 years...he can't do this to me now!!!"
"You know Tushi? Boys can do that. This is probably the harshest truth that boys forget everything that girls do for them, with time. Had Arush been telling you that he wanted a breakup?"
"Well the last time we talked, or rather we were fighting...things did go messy and ugly. We both were looking for a solution and resorted to having a break, I mean sort of a time off the relationship."
"So what's the problem now? You missing him or what?"
"Yeah!! I can't live any longer without talking to him!! This has never happened earlier Megha! I am missing him like anything...But he just doesn't seem to care!"
"Boys are strange, there's no doubt about that. But you can't really say that Arush is seeing through...god that would be awful!"
"Say?!! I can't even imagine of that sort of thing happening! Arush has never been so insensitive before. I wonder what's wrong.."
"Hey, you don't worry okay? When he realizes, he will contact you right away. I am sure he loves you too...wait...i gotta go now, my bro's back from his tuition. See ya gal friend!"
"Bye Megs and thanks for for being patient with me all this while!"
"Ah, that's never a prob sweety! Bye now."
"Buh Bye." I put down the receiver and wiped the tear mark on my cheek. I looked sadly at the sms in my inbox. The last sms from Arush. Things have never been right between us Tushi. There are too many differences in our views. I fear that it might create a bigger prob in the future. We need to cut down on our daily calls and sms. Anyway it's high time we should start studying for the school annuals. This maybe my last sms for this session. M not promising to send you any further wire till i think things are right between us. Who is he to decide what's right and what's not??? I love him too...and what is he thinking?? Will breaking my heart even out all the differences he had been pointing at?
I got a whole lot of information about our neighbors the next day. Luckily, our cleaning lady lives just below the apartment of the new-boy-in-the-block and his even stranger mom. But extracting information out of this cunning belle required tactics. Our maid however must not be looked down upon under any circumstances. Their family was one of the richest in our colony, but ill fated as they were, nothing worked out well for them. Their father died, leaving behind Fullora, who was our maid and her three brothers, of which none of them had received formal education. They merely fantasized of faring well in life with their dad's money. However the father died early and his business went into the hands of his 4 uneducated fools. The business suffered tremendous loss and they had to give away all the riches including the house, which the promoters tore down and constructed one of those structures of cement, which actually can't be called a building, but can house 4 to 5 families in its vestibule. Fullora is our part time maid now and her brothers go about doing odd jobs to pay for their apartment which was on ground floor.
"Fullora di, what was all that buzz in the building yesterday?? New tenants??"
"Yes didibhai, a new family has come up. But how do you know?"
"Well there was all this sound coming up from there in the aft while I was studying!! And i did see a lady in the balcony. She did scare me! That apartment has always been empty!"
"They are Christians. A mother, with her son and daughter. Her husband left today only for his job. He lives elsewhere."
"I see, the woman did look as if she was not from this place."
Fullora gave me a sharp look. "When did you notice all this?"
"Ah, that was when I was upstairs in the aft. I just got a glimpse." I replied casually. If I show too much of eagerness in front of her...she might spread out a gossip that I love stalking people when they are in their houses. These people can never let your hair go straight down. And spreading rumor was the only mode of entertainment they had. In any case, people of our locality hardly talked to their next door neighbors. So me, inquiring about one can raise many questions!
Days went by just like that....the Boy would come up to the balcony in the evening at times along with his phoney mom. I hated that lady's stares! Their was no kindness in the way she glared at me and I could see no point of introducing myself to her as the next to next door neighbor. Maybe she thought i might eat up her handsome child. The daughter hardly came out to the balcony, but I was least bothered in her. I longed to see that boy's face up close. His face resembled Arush's in many standards except for the hair and built.. This Boy had a muscular built bod and brown hair with natural caramel highlights on his head. The complexion was fair enough! Arush's hair was shabby black and he was thin built. But the face cut was so similer. Maybe I saw my Arush in him and that's why the Boy appeared to be so exotic to me. By this time he seemed to have noticed me too as i frequented the window seat for studying. He doesn't mind coming up shirtless at all!
"Oh Megs, he is soooooo handsome! I could never imagine of having such a hot neighbor! He is a christian..and i believe he has noticed me too."
"Calm down girl! You lucky thing! Such hunks doesn't seem to appear at all in my vicinity!"
"Shall i try to talk to him? I don't know what he thinks about me though. His mom doesn't think positively about me and i am sure of it."
"Ah shit, he is staying with his mom. But Tushi baby...one thing I felt like asking...what about Arush? Any news from your absentee boyfriend?"
"No Megha, not a single call or sms. His phone is switched off all the time. Hey hey! Know what? This Boy looks a lot like Arush.."
"Owww so here's the glitch!"
"What are you talking about?"
"I now know the reason why u are suddenly getting so inclined to this new Boy!!"
"Inclined??? Had i been acting like a freak lately? Do you think I am being too much on this Boy?"
"Well baby yes. I was surprised when you didn't mention anything about Arush today! It's a Boy who looks a lot like Arush and he is your neighbor at an arm's distance."
"So what now?"
"So you decide whether u wanna try for this boy or keep to yourself. You didn't have any formal break up with Arush."
"Hey hey...I have no intentions of trying for this new Boy, okay? I just want to talk and maybe be friends...that's all I have in my mind! Getting eloped with this Boy would mean cheating on Arush, when I would rather die instead of having a fling."
"It's your choice baby...Have it your way."
"I gotta go now...I am not feeling well after talking about my bf...I am getting that sad depressed feeling again."
"Take it easy girly, bye now and take care!"
"Bye"
Trying on that Boy?!! What was Megha thinking???
I am a big time idiot!!!! The biggest fool, even bigger than our maid and her brothers. My act of tremendous stupidity made me lose my BIG chance! This time he was sitting on a chair in the usual place and was staring directly at me...i was just in front of the window...half hidden behind the curtains, but my face could be seen. This went on for 20 mins. And after that I lost my cool. What was he observing so much? What's going on? I wanted to perform some action as if to show that I am not perturbed by his gaze, but my insanity got the best of me! Maybe I wasn't thinking at all the time when I did what I wasn't supposed to do! Here's to my utter brainlessness and here's what I did. I closed the shutters with a slam! And I could not help thinking what an idiot I had been!!! I mean closing off the shutters right at the face of the person who was looking at you, when u actually wanted him to notice you too!!! Now opening them again and peeping out would mean that I am being desperate, if he happens to be there still now and notice.
What happened in the evening was even depressing. I had been cursing myself all the time for my performance piece of utter brainlessness in the morning. At around 8.30pm i heard a humming sound coming from outside. Somebody was singing and the tune was wonderful! I peeped out and there was my Boy, humming away. He froze however when he saw me...I gathered up all my courage and finally asked him.
"Was it you who was humming? It was awesome!"
He ran inside the moment I finished saying the last sentence! I was so shocked...I mean i didn't know how to respond to this type of behavior! I felt like a complete idiot. Maybe asking him was not at all a good idea after all that had happened in the morn. And i believe i had just made it worse between us!
School final exams were only a month away and my mum forcibly made me sit and study downstairs in her room. It was her belief that I would concentrate more when she was around. I didn't get to see the Boy again for many more months. Occasionally I would go upstairs to my room and stand by the window..he never came nor did his looney mom. Their apartment seemed deserted and my sadness increased.
The exam monster came like a storm and left nothing behind for me. However this doesn't include academics. I cleared my B.Tech entrance in a wiz and soared higher when the results were out. I got admission in one of the best Engineering colleges of India, but sadly it was away from my hometown, Kolkata. As for all the things that were not there in my life...well Arush broke up with me. He called up finally one day and said that he can't carry on with our relationship. The aftermath, I wish not to discuss cause it was just too painful, very painful. This was one of the reasons why I badly felt like leaving my hometown and studying elsewhere.
I never got the chance of seeing that boy again even though he and his family had been staying in the same apartment, which I later got to know from our maid. This was such an unfinished story...I don't feel sad for it nowadays though...just disappointed at life's strange turn of events. We meet so many people in this world...people who live far far away from us and yet, as if through a loophole in the system, which we call life...we cross all borders to come into each other's lives. He was just a Boy next door about whom I wanted to know more...but there's no chance at all it seems. Here, for the first time in my life I am seeing a 0 possibility event...and the strangest thing - He just stays in a place which is a bit more than an arm's distance from my window!
After the lunch, I came back to my room and reopened the shutters. This time there was a lady in the same balcony who seemed to be in her fifties. She too had the same features which her son possessed. However she seemed to have noticed me staring at her and immediately adjusted her glasses for a better look at the person who was stalking her. I pretended not to notice...her gaze was not friendly. The window where I was standing was just beside my bed and in front of was my study table. Usually I don't sit down at my table to do my lessons...but today I had too. Sitting on a chair and studying for hours gives me tremendous back ache. I prefer to do my work rolling on the bed, much to the disapproval of my parents. But my curiosity got the best of me today. I just have to see the boy again, maybe this time I would want him to notice me too.
1 Hour...2 hours....and so on...no one appeared in the balcony. Maybe sitting here had not been a good idea, anyway my lessons were in the doldrums due to this expectation-wise distraction. And the back ache was getting worse...I thought of taking a break (well not from studying since I have read nothing all afternoon) from this sudden sitting-in-the-table-chair-studying and decided to continue with my lessons in the usual way. I studied for the next 3 hours without any intention of getting distracted on my own, I had strictly told myself not to think about any stray person while you are studying. And I didn't do that, all the time i was catering to my brain the valuable facts of chemistry.
"It's been 2 and a half months already Megha, he didn't give any reply to my sms!!!"
"Did you call him? Or emailed him or anything?"
"I have tried every possible way of reaching him yaar, I don't think Arush is interested in our relationship anymore...it's breaking my heart Megs...we have been together for 3 years...he can't do this to me now!!!"
"You know Tushi? Boys can do that. This is probably the harshest truth that boys forget everything that girls do for them, with time. Had Arush been telling you that he wanted a breakup?"
"Well the last time we talked, or rather we were fighting...things did go messy and ugly. We both were looking for a solution and resorted to having a break, I mean sort of a time off the relationship."
"So what's the problem now? You missing him or what?"
"Yeah!! I can't live any longer without talking to him!! This has never happened earlier Megha! I am missing him like anything...But he just doesn't seem to care!"
"Boys are strange, there's no doubt about that. But you can't really say that Arush is seeing through...god that would be awful!"
"Say?!! I can't even imagine of that sort of thing happening! Arush has never been so insensitive before. I wonder what's wrong.."
"Hey, you don't worry okay? When he realizes, he will contact you right away. I am sure he loves you too...wait...i gotta go now, my bro's back from his tuition. See ya gal friend!"
"Bye Megs and thanks for for being patient with me all this while!"
"Ah, that's never a prob sweety! Bye now."
"Buh Bye." I put down the receiver and wiped the tear mark on my cheek. I looked sadly at the sms in my inbox. The last sms from Arush. Things have never been right between us Tushi. There are too many differences in our views. I fear that it might create a bigger prob in the future. We need to cut down on our daily calls and sms. Anyway it's high time we should start studying for the school annuals. This maybe my last sms for this session. M not promising to send you any further wire till i think things are right between us. Who is he to decide what's right and what's not??? I love him too...and what is he thinking?? Will breaking my heart even out all the differences he had been pointing at?
I got a whole lot of information about our neighbors the next day. Luckily, our cleaning lady lives just below the apartment of the new-boy-in-the-block and his even stranger mom. But extracting information out of this cunning belle required tactics. Our maid however must not be looked down upon under any circumstances. Their family was one of the richest in our colony, but ill fated as they were, nothing worked out well for them. Their father died, leaving behind Fullora, who was our maid and her three brothers, of which none of them had received formal education. They merely fantasized of faring well in life with their dad's money. However the father died early and his business went into the hands of his 4 uneducated fools. The business suffered tremendous loss and they had to give away all the riches including the house, which the promoters tore down and constructed one of those structures of cement, which actually can't be called a building, but can house 4 to 5 families in its vestibule. Fullora is our part time maid now and her brothers go about doing odd jobs to pay for their apartment which was on ground floor.
"Fullora di, what was all that buzz in the building yesterday?? New tenants??"
"Yes didibhai, a new family has come up. But how do you know?"
"Well there was all this sound coming up from there in the aft while I was studying!! And i did see a lady in the balcony. She did scare me! That apartment has always been empty!"
"They are Christians. A mother, with her son and daughter. Her husband left today only for his job. He lives elsewhere."
"I see, the woman did look as if she was not from this place."
Fullora gave me a sharp look. "When did you notice all this?"
"Ah, that was when I was upstairs in the aft. I just got a glimpse." I replied casually. If I show too much of eagerness in front of her...she might spread out a gossip that I love stalking people when they are in their houses. These people can never let your hair go straight down. And spreading rumor was the only mode of entertainment they had. In any case, people of our locality hardly talked to their next door neighbors. So me, inquiring about one can raise many questions!
Days went by just like that....the Boy would come up to the balcony in the evening at times along with his phoney mom. I hated that lady's stares! Their was no kindness in the way she glared at me and I could see no point of introducing myself to her as the next to next door neighbor. Maybe she thought i might eat up her handsome child. The daughter hardly came out to the balcony, but I was least bothered in her. I longed to see that boy's face up close. His face resembled Arush's in many standards except for the hair and built.. This Boy had a muscular built bod and brown hair with natural caramel highlights on his head. The complexion was fair enough! Arush's hair was shabby black and he was thin built. But the face cut was so similer. Maybe I saw my Arush in him and that's why the Boy appeared to be so exotic to me. By this time he seemed to have noticed me too as i frequented the window seat for studying. He doesn't mind coming up shirtless at all!
"Oh Megs, he is soooooo handsome! I could never imagine of having such a hot neighbor! He is a christian..and i believe he has noticed me too."
"Calm down girl! You lucky thing! Such hunks doesn't seem to appear at all in my vicinity!"
"Shall i try to talk to him? I don't know what he thinks about me though. His mom doesn't think positively about me and i am sure of it."
"Ah shit, he is staying with his mom. But Tushi baby...one thing I felt like asking...what about Arush? Any news from your absentee boyfriend?"
"No Megha, not a single call or sms. His phone is switched off all the time. Hey hey! Know what? This Boy looks a lot like Arush.."
"Owww so here's the glitch!"
"What are you talking about?"
"I now know the reason why u are suddenly getting so inclined to this new Boy!!"
"Inclined??? Had i been acting like a freak lately? Do you think I am being too much on this Boy?"
"Well baby yes. I was surprised when you didn't mention anything about Arush today! It's a Boy who looks a lot like Arush and he is your neighbor at an arm's distance."
"So what now?"
"So you decide whether u wanna try for this boy or keep to yourself. You didn't have any formal break up with Arush."
"Hey hey...I have no intentions of trying for this new Boy, okay? I just want to talk and maybe be friends...that's all I have in my mind! Getting eloped with this Boy would mean cheating on Arush, when I would rather die instead of having a fling."
"It's your choice baby...Have it your way."
"I gotta go now...I am not feeling well after talking about my bf...I am getting that sad depressed feeling again."
"Take it easy girly, bye now and take care!"
"Bye"
Trying on that Boy?!! What was Megha thinking???
I am a big time idiot!!!! The biggest fool, even bigger than our maid and her brothers. My act of tremendous stupidity made me lose my BIG chance! This time he was sitting on a chair in the usual place and was staring directly at me...i was just in front of the window...half hidden behind the curtains, but my face could be seen. This went on for 20 mins. And after that I lost my cool. What was he observing so much? What's going on? I wanted to perform some action as if to show that I am not perturbed by his gaze, but my insanity got the best of me! Maybe I wasn't thinking at all the time when I did what I wasn't supposed to do! Here's to my utter brainlessness and here's what I did. I closed the shutters with a slam! And I could not help thinking what an idiot I had been!!! I mean closing off the shutters right at the face of the person who was looking at you, when u actually wanted him to notice you too!!! Now opening them again and peeping out would mean that I am being desperate, if he happens to be there still now and notice.
What happened in the evening was even depressing. I had been cursing myself all the time for my performance piece of utter brainlessness in the morning. At around 8.30pm i heard a humming sound coming from outside. Somebody was singing and the tune was wonderful! I peeped out and there was my Boy, humming away. He froze however when he saw me...I gathered up all my courage and finally asked him.
"Was it you who was humming? It was awesome!"
He ran inside the moment I finished saying the last sentence! I was so shocked...I mean i didn't know how to respond to this type of behavior! I felt like a complete idiot. Maybe asking him was not at all a good idea after all that had happened in the morn. And i believe i had just made it worse between us!
School final exams were only a month away and my mum forcibly made me sit and study downstairs in her room. It was her belief that I would concentrate more when she was around. I didn't get to see the Boy again for many more months. Occasionally I would go upstairs to my room and stand by the window..he never came nor did his looney mom. Their apartment seemed deserted and my sadness increased.
The exam monster came like a storm and left nothing behind for me. However this doesn't include academics. I cleared my B.Tech entrance in a wiz and soared higher when the results were out. I got admission in one of the best Engineering colleges of India, but sadly it was away from my hometown, Kolkata. As for all the things that were not there in my life...well Arush broke up with me. He called up finally one day and said that he can't carry on with our relationship. The aftermath, I wish not to discuss cause it was just too painful, very painful. This was one of the reasons why I badly felt like leaving my hometown and studying elsewhere.
I never got the chance of seeing that boy again even though he and his family had been staying in the same apartment, which I later got to know from our maid. This was such an unfinished story...I don't feel sad for it nowadays though...just disappointed at life's strange turn of events. We meet so many people in this world...people who live far far away from us and yet, as if through a loophole in the system, which we call life...we cross all borders to come into each other's lives. He was just a Boy next door about whom I wanted to know more...but there's no chance at all it seems. Here, for the first time in my life I am seeing a 0 possibility event...and the strangest thing - He just stays in a place which is a bit more than an arm's distance from my window!
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